Welcome to Ask Me Anything Wednesday! This week I’m giving you scripts to ask coworkers how much they make and explaining why it’s your business.
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Should I ask a coworker how much they make?
(If yes, how do I do it?!)
Yes, you should be asking coworkers how much they make, especially if you have even the slightest inkling that you’re underpaid.
Who wins when we’re silent about salaries? Not us. Employers (and clients) are the ones who benefit. When we share information about how much we earn, it helps others at the negotiating table. This is especially true for creatives, freelancers, and the self-employed.
Here’s a dramatic and 100% true example.
About seven years ago I was speaking on a panel with another personal finance expert. Our resumes were evenly matched, we’re close in age and based in big cities. All this to say, we should have been charging similar rates. Well, I worked up the nerve to ask her what she charged for the event and she told me $10,000.
I charged $3,000.
We had a $7,000 discrepancy for the same amount of work and I never would’ve known without asking. Obviously, it taught me a thing or two about researching rates and asking other people for guidance.
I’m quick to share my rates with fellow personal finance freelancers, especially when it comes to writing and speaking engagements. It makes it easier for me to negotiate a raise in the future if other folks are asking for similar rates. There should be a “rising tide lifts all boats” mentality when it comes to discussing rates and negotiating.
Wait, can I get fired for asking?
For Americans, technically, no. It’s illegal under the National Labor Relationships Act for most employers to bar their employees from discussing salaries. However, you need to know the vibe at your workplace. If it feels like talking salaries is a cultural no-no, then be wary. A boss can always find another reason to fire you and they’re probably betting you won’t take the time and money it costs to hire a lawyer to fight it. (Don’t worry, I have suggestions on deck for what to do!)
How do you ask?
Caitlin Boston, who I interviewed in Broke Millennial Talks Money, unearthed racial and gender wage disparities at her work. Her technique for asking is a personal favorite of mine as well: Over/under.
“Do you make over or under $[insert amount here]?”
It’s a way to ask the question without making the other person too uncomfortable because it gives them a bit of an out. Asking “how much do you make” directly usually produces some squirming and a rushed excuse to leave.
You can ask directly, but couch it with some context.
“I’m doing some research because I’m preparing to ask for a raise and I think you have some information that could help me. Would you be willing to share your salary with me?”
If you’re uncomfortable asking your coworkers in the office, take this to the Internet! Try cold pitching folks on LinkedIn or your alumni group or any other professional network to which you have access. You want to ask folks who work at similar sized companies and in the same or a comparable city/town (unless it’s a fully remote gig). You also want to cold pitch a lot of folks and be sure to include a diverse group to help control for racial and gender wage gaps.
You can still use the over/under strategy and give some additional context about why you’re asking.
“I’m getting ready to ask for a raise. I want to make sure that my expectations aren’t too high or too low. I was hoping you could help me calibrate what I should ask for.”
or
“I’m getting the sense that I’m significantly underpaid compared to certain co-workers [you can be explicit if you want] and I’m hoping you can help me test that assumption. It would be helpful if you could share what you think I should be making or what salary you think I should be asking for.”
Want more help navigating awkward money talks?
Check out Broke Millennial Talks Money. There’s an entire section about how to talk money at work, which includes negotiating!
To Recap:
It’s important to talk about salary and rates, which includes the self-employed!
Use the over/under strategy to ask someone how much they make.
Cold pitch folks on LinkedIn or similar professional networks to get help setting your bar for how much you should be getting paid.
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Why renting isn’t throwing away your money, Should you be debt free before you start investing?, How much you actually need in an emergency fund.
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Cash back portals like Rakuten and Honey, Fractional Shares, Credit cards with a high annual fee
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